Improvised Crumble

Image

My mum had grown so much rhubarb in her garden it was in excess of her requirements. She left some with my sister, who never bakes and is from the “overcook pasta, add cheese” school of cookery. My sister presented me with a recipe handed down to her by one of the oldies at her office. Hand written and on yellowing paper, it was for a rhubarb and orange flan. Pretty basic stuff, but way beyond the skills set of my sis, who I’m pretty sure I witnessed kneading some pastry for ten minutes once in order to lovingly present the family with the worlds chewiest pasties. After purchasing the missing ingredients for the flan, I set about making it in my sister’s ill equipped kitchen. Blunt knives, no round flan base or pie dishes and more crucially, no weighing scales. I toyed with the idea of guessing the weights, but felt it was too high risk that the curd filling would not set or be too hard. I also considered going and getting my own scales, but could not be arsed. In the end I announced that we would be having rhubarb and orange crumble instead and set about making something totally easy without the need for scales.

Image

I chopped the rhubarb into small pieces and stewed it with a big handful of sugar and the juice and grated rind of an orange. When soft, I checked it and added more sugar to taste.

I got about half a packet of butter and roughly the same volume of sugar and rubbed the butter into twice its volume of flour, before adding the sugar. I used a large tumbler to roughly measure volume. I squashed it into a dough ball and pressed that into rough shaped biscuits and baked in a medium to hot oven until crispy and golden .

I never understand why I am so often presented with crumbles that are more soggy than crumbly and crunchy. What I usually do is make rough biscuits, as described above, then when cooked, crumble big chunks onto the fruit base adding smaller crumbs as well and warm quickly in the oven before serving with ice cream, cream, or custard. I saw Raymond Blanc on the TV adopting a similar technique for avoiding a soggy crumble a short while after I had devised my own genius method, so don’t knock it!

Image

Image

Kitten Playschool

Image

 

 

The kittens are now running around the bedroom freely and I have to tread very carefully the whole time I am in there. They seem to be stuck in a constant loop of sleeping in a pile, waking, hitting each other in the face and then sprinting up and down the length of the room. It is an adventure playground for them in there, full of things to try and climb up, dangling fabrics to whack and chew on and shoes to snuggle in.

 

Cat Sanctuary-Cat Factory

Image

This ball of fluff and cuteness just entered our lives one day. Chaperoned by the infamous Ghost Cat (see Ruby Tuesday #1 « Oh, Nicola Joy! ).  She was meowing constantly and very hungry. Clark, being a self proclaimed cat expert, (I was raised with wolves dogs) declared that it was a girl and pregnant. After she did a smelly poo in the kitchen this all changed. He named him Oscar and administered worm tablets. Meanwhile, I was working funny shifts, coming home at weird times and suggesting that maybe he/her should see a vet.

Image

Oscar saw a vet and is in good health, around two years old… but actually a female and pregnant. She could give birth any time in the next week or two. She has her own collar with our phone number in a locket because we are going to take care of her now.

It turns out that its not rare for owners to abandon female cats once they get pregnant. This may be what Rosie/Poppy/Daisy’s back story is but we don’t know. She won’t talk about it.

She is too fat to get out of the cat flap now, so has a litter tray, which she used straight away (more evidence of having a previous owner) .She has an appointment to get spayed in three months time, otherwise, she will just keep on getting pregnant ( she is hot stuff). Positioned around the house are baskets lined with shredded paper and sheets of paper on top, plus drawers have been emptied and lined with the same. She is looking for a safe place to give birth and we have made sure there are plenty of options for her.

Image

We are also providing a lot of extra food because she is so hungry now and her belly is so big with kittens. I’m so exited for the day when the kittens pop out. Its going to be a cuteness overload.

Ruby is not so happy about there being a new addition to the household. She has to be given lots of fuss to show that she is still loved. She is horrible to Daisy/Rosie/Poppy, so we try to keep them apart. Also , she likes to decorate the birthing boxes with her urine if we are not careful. She is such an angry, bitter, unfriendly creature but that really is part of her charm, bless her.

Image

Also, nothing has been seen of Ghost Cat since the night he showed up with Rosie. I like to imagine that he is the father and helped his kittens by showing the way to a good home. lets not forget he was a bit of a fatty, so probably had a home of his own.

10 Essential Pregnant Cat Care Tips | The Cat Owner Club | Cat Care | The Cat Owner Club.

Feed The Birds…

Our feathered friends can struggle to find enough food in the winter months and one of my favourite winter crafts is to make bird feeders.  Hang them outside and watch the bids nibble away.  This is also a good activity to do with children.

I have made some using pine cones, lard and seeds…yum!

Pine Cone Bird Feeder | How To | Cut Out + Keep.

Ten Reasons To Be Happy Its January

 

1: You can enter shops, restaurants, workplaces and your own home safe in the knowledge that you will NOT hear any Christmas music. The old songs are the best are they Wizard? Not when you’ve heard them five thousand times and are only approximately a third of the way through your life they’re not.

 

2: Everything is half price. Yes, most of it is tat and you would be foolish to start buying it all up in a frenzy on the basis that it used to be twice as expensive…but if you need it or really want it (and can afford it ) then I say go for it.

 

3: You can relax and basically do nothing for a while after all the cramming in of friends/family/colleagues/shopping/baking hits an eerie yet welcome standstill.

 

4: You can be a penny pinching cheapskate without anybody pressuring you to spend money that you don’t have. Everybody else is cutting back now too after their OTT December ways.

 

 

5: It might snow soon. It usually does in January or February and as we all know, snow equals nationwide skiving off work and comedy snowmen/snowpenises everywhere.

 

6: January is a good month for socialising, pressure free. Your friends are all of a sudden available and quite possibly on a bit of a downer after all of the forced cheer of the previous month. A warning, however: they will probably be skint, as mentioned earlier. The more I read point 6, the more I’m not so sure about it…

 

 

7: We have passed the Winter Solstice, so its all longer days and shorter nights from now on.

 

8: Charity shops are full of shiny new books and other brand new unwanted gifts. I love shopping for books in charity shops as much for the random aspect of what you may find as the 50p-£2.00 price range.

 

9: If you are creative, you can incorporate your relaxation with some self indulgent crafting. No more gifts or cards or decorations to be finished. Choose a project to make just for you…I am considering making a crocheted ear warmer from this tutorial: Cute Ear Warmer | Creation | Cut Out + Keep.

 

 

10: You probably still have lots of chocolates and, if you are very lucky, booze left. If this is the case then you can sit back, relax, watch some crap January telly and scoff your face without even having to go out in the cold to get supplies from the shop. Heaven…

The Ladies Oracle

    Yesterday I began tidying my art and craft room after making a right mess in there making Christmas decorations and presents. It is a tiny little room, perhaps only fit for storage really, but with my system of drawers on top of drawers,and  folders and baskets crammed where they fit you find that there is a place for everything. It is during these tidying sessions that I really familiarise myself with the chaos, so that at some point in the future I can realise I need black sparkly wool and know that is in the drawers under the computer desk, second drawer up, in the gold zip bag at the back.

   I also tend to find things I had forgotten about, such as this delightful old book…

As you can see it is quite worn around the spine so  have made a point of keeping it in a safer place from now on. The book was reprinted in 1966 and has this message carefully written in fountain pen on the inside:

To consult the Oracle, first you must choose your question from a list of 100 deliciously old fashioned musings, such as “The Gentleman that I am glad too see, does he think of me?” and “ought I to fear the tête a tête?”.    I chose question 36 “Ought I execute the project I have formed?” As it seemed quite fitting, with my new found enthusiasm and all…

Whilst concentrating on the question I hovered my finger over a table of symbols with my eyes closed and chose one at random. This corresponded with my question number on a table, telling me on which page I would find the answer I sought…upon finding the page, you again locate the symbol and there you have the words of dusty wisdom. Mine happened to be “You have never conceived a better one”.

How did it come to this?

I was after all, the kid who was never bored…often to be found at my desk or the dining table making candles, cards, jewellery, pictures, cakes…or whatever I was into that week. Needless to say I was not the child with the most friends, though I wasn’t entirely friendless.

I discovered partying and there was a noticeable decline in my creative offerings…

I went to Art College but couldn’t be arsed with explaining every creative action in terms of its reference and relevance. That is to say when I actually attended as I seem to remember spending most of it working/drinking in the pub.

There was the time when I actually made a meagre living selling crappy prints and portraits on ebay, having found myself almost jobless and living in a bedsit in Leicester. A highlight of that era was the week when I survived on discount (stale) bread and homemade dhal, rushing to complete yet another watercolour of some ugly cat I’d been given a shit picture of.

Somehow I managed to pick myself up, avoid starvation and cultivate a sort of normal and happy life for myself. And here I am…with a relinquished lust for creating things with my own fair hands, be it edible or ornamental, fashionable or practical. The journey starts (again) here.